Mama, I Don't Want To Go To School!

It's gonna be a brand new year, 2010! Guess it is also the time parents are anxious about sending their precious darling to preschool, especially those who are first timers. As a class teacher, I often hear parents saying, "My child always cry whenever we mention the word 'school'. What can we do to ease the tension?"

First of all, congratulation in finding a great school. It must have been a lot of hard work on your part looking for one that suits your child and your needs. Before sending your child to school, here are some extra tips that you can rely on to ensure smooth transition.

1. Request for an orientation with the class teacher. 
Arrange to meet the class teacher for about 15 minutes a few days before your little one starts school. During this short period of time, get familiarized with her (remember my 4 Golden Rules of being the ideal parent. Read my previous post if you have not done so.) Check out the daily routine, menu and bring along your child so that he can have a general feel of the class atmosphere. Highlight some of the issues that your child might face such as hating greens, toilet-training or any peculiar habits. 

2. Be firm emotionally. 

Yes, this is the MOST difficult part, especially for mothers. I used to babysit a pair of twins  in the past. I felt SO GUILTY when I saw tears welling in their eyes as I left them in Sunday school. But being in educational line myself, I know that I can trust them in the hands of the teachers. Indeed, at the end of the day, the boys had so much fun that they did not want to leave! 

My lovely pair of twins - KKDD

They are big boys now... This year, KKDD are officially in P1!

Many mums often make the request to stay in class for the first few days so that they can  accompany the child in routine care (showering, meal time or even nap). Honestly, this is not advisable because your child will 'stick' to you and EXPECT YOU to be around in the classroom. This will cause greater anxiety in him/her when eventually, you have to leave to go work.

My advise? Send your child to school, say 'bye' (don't hide and run away because you will cause greater insecurity in her) and GO (stop saying endless goodbyes). Pick her earlier from school during the first week so that she will be able to adapt to the new environment gradually. Most importantly, GO TO SCHOOL EVERYDAY so that he can make friends and learn interesting concepts. 


3. Ask for regular updates. 
Class newsletters are common in preschool nowadays... unless the childcare is super outdated in their curriculum. Through newsletters, you will usually read about learning activities, announcement and events. In my case, my class parents receive daily updates  through reading my tweets. You can also check out the most convenient time that you can ring the teacher if you need to ask any questions (avoid long phone calls during her lunch hour to score points in being the ideal parent). Alternatively, write notes in the communication book to state any concerns you have. Allow 1-2 days for reply. 


Finally, how much time should you give for your child to settle in the new school? Anytime between 1 to 3 weeks. Some children might take even a month, if they are very young (18 months to 24 months).


Be calm and steady... Good luck to you and I believe that your child will shine! 


*All photos of children are posted with permission. 

Parents, Are You Well Liked By Your Child's Teachers?

Why would I write about this topic as my first post? Am I not afraid that parents may get offended? Well, it's fine with me if you are... but if you want your child to have a great headstart in his/her preschool as much as I do, don't miss reading this!

Yes, I could hear what you are saying in your heart: "I've paid so much for the childcare service! Why should I bother whether my child's class teacher likes me or not?!"

Up till now, I have been working full pledged in early childhood industry for about 9 years. 3 years as a field practicum student and 6 years as a class teacher. Whether it is at void deck childcare setting, which charges like peanuts or premium preschool, where fees can be used to pay for a degree course, getting your child's teacher to like you is crucial.

Let me tell you why...

Not that she will abuse your child while you are at work, but it will definitely be awesome to build a positive relationship. The child is a reflection of the parent (which is YOU). If you are nice towards the class teacher, it is easier for her to bond with your child. There are certain types of parents that teachers want to avoid and hide...(no matter how friendly she seems in front of you when you talk... in fact she wishes that you'll hurry up and finish speaking)... BECAUSE TEACHERS ARE HUMANS TOO!

So what kind of parents that every preschool teacher wish to work with?

Friendly parents

Do you smile when you send your child to school? Maybe you just had your Botox and you forgot your whitening mask the night before, but showing a 'black face' (especially if it is done consistently) will dampen anyone's mood. Your child's teacher as well. Well, well, well, we know that without your money, the school can't pay our salary. But c'mon, frankly speaking, we don't owe you a single cent. If this school doesn't pay us what we deserved, we can work for another one down the street.

Smile. You will light up the classroom. Apply some PR skills, not just at your workplace, but in your child's school as well.

Pengene (Qi Han's mummy) - She has great smiles on her face everyday!

Constructive Parents

Once, there was a dad who complained about his child being hungry all the time, especially when he returns home. The dad came to school and shouted all sorts of vulgarities at the poor teacher in front of the juniors and other parents. (In case if you are wondering, it's NOT ME. THANKFULLY.)

Shouting at your child's teacher is the WORST THING and you must AVOID at all cost. There's a saying that goes, "When the teacher is happy, the children will be happy". It's true. The upbeat energy transfers from the teacher to the children. How happy will the teacher be if you scream at her in the early morning? If you need to complain, do it constructively. State your case in a civilized manner and we do listen to your constructive feedback. NOTE: CONSTRUCTIVE, not DESTRUCTIVE filled with #$%!#!@$%^.

Eunice and Vincent (Xavier's parents) - They provide constructive feedback which benefit the school and class management!

Good-Natured Parents

Good natured parents quickly gain lots of popularity among teachers. Words get around like the speed of lightning, especially in a female working environment. We know who are the 'nice' parents and who are the 'fussy' ones. When I was a newbie, I paused in my cutting to pick up a child who had a nightmare. I put the pair of scissors in my pocket with the blade poking out unknowingly. The child brushed her leg against it and had a very light but long superficial graze. Honestly, I was pretty scared when I realized it. I spoke to my supervisor and her first response is, "Call the mum... she's OK (the mum)." True enough, the mum said, "It's OK... don't worry. I understand. Just be more careful the next time." *Phew. Thank God that she didn't sue me. Today, the entire family has moved to the States, but Michelle (the mum) and I are still in contact via Facebook! At the same time, I know of parents who will not spare the teachers just because of one mosquito bite.

Yan Hui (Cindy's mum) - Very kind and cooperative with teachers.

Appreciative Parents

My ex-colleague, Aisha received a Kate Spade wallet from one of the parents. We were like WOW! KATE SPADE! Don't get me wrong. It is not about the price tags that accompany the gifts we received, but the thoughts behind it. We can sense if the present is a sincere one, or some post Christmas gifts that you didn't want and reuse it. Once, I received a baby cutlery as Teachers Day present. Why on earth would I need it? Am I still a baby? But yeah, it's still in my kitchen drawer somewhere...

Chwee Lay (Markko's mum) is one of the most appreciate parents I have ever met.

Besides presents, what are some other ways to convey your appreciation to the teacher? A sincere eye to eye contact and warm "thank you". Write a compliment letter to the school management to praise your child's teacher. Jess Lair once said, "Praise is like sunlight to the human spirit: we cannot flower and grow without it." We teachers, need your support and love too.

Take my advice. Be the ideal parent that all teachers wish for.